Family Life

There's been so much going on lately that I am outrageously stressed. I'm not eating or sleeping well, I'm exhausted, my moods have been every which way, and a simple action can immediately change my outlook on the rest of the day.

I miss my boyfriend. It's a relatively new relationship, but I am completely comfortable with him. I can tell him anything that's on my mind. We have fun together, always laughing and smiling. I wish he lived closer, or that I was closer to him.The long distance relationship is definitely hard. He lives a little under 2 hours away, and the hours we both work are hard for us to spend time together. Of course, that makes me wish for a different line of work, or a change in my schedule. Which has also changed a lot lately.

Work had been unbelievably slow, sales wise. Unfortunately, that makes more work for me since I have to send everyone else home and it leaves the work for me. In addition to this, we just lost a manager, so my workload is double. Granted, I wanted the hours, but not this way. I'm pulling enough hours now, but they're not the kind of hours I want to be working. Stevie starts school in the fall and I'd like a job that is a day shift so I can be home with him in the evenings and on weekends.

Stevie. That's another stress. I love my child, but he's been getting so unruly lately. Between not listening, trying to find daycare on a daily basis, getting into things he shouldn't, I'm about to go crazy. I don't know how to go on with this. He gets time outs, spankings, toys taken away; I just don't know what else is going to help with his behavior.

Those of you that know me, I'm a people person. I like to have people around me majority of the time. I like to talk out my feelings, but only with those I know well enough to open up to. Lately, all those people have been busy. I can't text them, or see them because of schedule conflicts, and I feel like I have a lot of unwanted stress from that alone. I'm used to my girls being here to vent to, and they don't have the time right now. I don't blame them. I'd be off living life with my man if he was here, and work is always a time consumer.

I want HAPPINESS, FAMILY, and a regular schedule. I want to come home and cook dinner for the family; hubby, kids, dogs, etc. How do I get my life the way I want it? I feel like it's impossible to get anywhere at the job I'm at, but nothing else is coming my way. I want a family life, not a stress ball. How do I get there?

Work.... and my new realization

I just recently realized that I make things so much harder on myself than needed.

Last night when leaving work for the day, I was talking with some of my fellow employees. Today being the first of the month, April Fools, and FRIDAY, means tonight will be SUPER busy at work. The employee working the day shift today has a tendency to not get things done when there by themself and I was considering going in early this morning to help them, which I was discussing with my fellow employees last night.

Today's morning shift employee has been there quite awhile and should be able to do things on her own if I can pretty much do them and I'm as new as I am. Being that they have been there A LOT longer than myself, there should be absolutely NO reason I should go in early today. I was trying to think ahead and be 100% sure we would be ready for the rush tonight, but why? The day shift is not my responsibility today. I need to be ready for the rush tonight and not be worn out. Why can't this person take responsibility and do THEIR job?

Granted, I will be one of the shift managers soon, but so is this trouble employee. If they are capable of being a shift manager, they should be able to handle this. Personally, I already feel like prepping for tonight is my duty, but why? I don't understand why I feel responsible, but I do. I guess it's just my way. Maybe when I get my certification to manage, I'll be a little better, but it seems like I always put too much pressure on myself to make sure EVERYTHING is done and done right. Is this a bad thing?

Really looking for some insight, so if anyone has comments, please let me know :)

Things to come...

I've been thinking that my life needs to turn up instead of down lately. Things just haven't been going my way and I'm going to change it. My new job helps a lot, makes me a happier me, but things that have bugged me in the past, aren't going to anymore. Well, I'll TRY to not let them bug me. I'm trying to make my life better and in that, my relationships.

Honestly, working has given me more to look for in life. My goal is to complete my training for manager, which should be completed by the end of next month, but we'll see how that goes. This goal will help me stay on track.

In my relationships, I'm trying not to critize as much, be more open, and not as jealous. There are people who love me, and they love me for who I am no matter what. But things can only be easier if I overcome these obstacles. Any advice or words of wisdom are more than welcome.

I WANT THAT

So this morning, the family was all sitting in the living room watching a movie. My BF, Zak, just watching, sitting next to me, but not cuddling much as he's so interested in Bruce Willis's movie, Surrogates. Stevie running around, then sitting and watching, then back to running around, as every almost-3 year old will do.

Zak goes and pulls a yogurt out of the fridge, and Stevie immediately says, "I want that. I have some?" Zak grabs one for the little guy. I get some coffee, Stevie says the same thing. He's learning he's too little for coffee, but he still tries for anything someone else has. Someone in the room pulls out ciggarettes, and of course, Stevie asks for them. I flatly told him, "I catch you with those, EVER, and I will kick your butt!!"

A Little About Me

I am a mother, a daughter, a girlfriend, and a best friend. I am loyal, caring, and fun-loving. I love to spend time with my family and my friends, and I can't seem to sit still for long.

I just started a new job and I love it. Most people wouldn't think a job at Pizza Hut would be fun, but, I'm in training to be a shift manager, which is interesting, fun, and challenging. Everyone seems nice, but I wonder how much that will change when they find out I'll be shift manager soon. It may seem strange, but I like my boss, she and I get along great. I look forward to my following days.

My boyfriend was more or less living with me, but he's got many things coming with the summer that he needs to see to at his house. It honestly hurts me pretty bad, since it feels like we're taking a step backwards in our relationship, instead of going forward. I would love to continue waking up to my best friend and the love of my life. I'm not sure how long him being at his house will last since he and his father can't seem to get along for more than a couple days. We'll see how things pan out.

I'm always looking to make a new friend, so if you want to chat or what-not, send me a message :)

Scanlon1041